Hey y'all. Is Joy inheriting my sense of style or what?
Taking a few deep breaths last week was good for all of us. Rest has always been good medicine physically for me and it turns out its really good spiritually for me too. Not resting like secluding myself and staying away from God. Rest as in just burying my head in a safe place and pushing pause on my plans. My solutions. My longings.
Lately I've had the opportunity to trust the Lord for everything that I hold dear. My fear for our safety has been in full force. My anxieties about the future went through the roof. Facing life as a single parent head-on, I decided it was time to saddle up. The first half of the week I did all that I needed to do tangibly to keep us safe. Realizing that a tiny thing can wreak havoc in a woman's mind I stopped short of hiring a sniper to sit on my roof. I mean, every now and then we may blow things out of proportion. Just putting that out there.
Anyway, none of that is the point. The point is what I did the second half of the week...gave up control of the need to control. I figured out that for a non-control freak giving up control for just about everything isn't hard. I've got that down. But. Giving up control that I'm the protector of my kids, putting our vulnerabilities out there for the taking-that's something I just couldn't do. Last December 19th my role as a mother changed. No longer could I protect them from heartache and fear. That changed in an instant. My role became protecting them from harm, the way their daddy had done before that day. And became the one people have to answer to on all accounts. More important that any of that, though, it's my job to show them who God is. How He is our shield, our defender. He is good enough and safe enough to put all of our eggs in His basket. If they see me choose the freedom God offers me every day then they will want to do the same thing when life isn't easy. Even more important than this (very important thing I can teach them,) is that I make time to BE WITH HIM to learn these things. My kids benefit far more from seeing me pray and read my Bible than from me telling them they should do those things. Let's just put something else out there-it's hard to read anything with little kids in your vicinity. I mean y'all I've already used all of my brain cells today and it's noon. But last week was so refreshing for my spirit and heart that I'm gonna do what I said I'd never do.
Wake up earlier than my kids.
Yikes.
They wake up early. To their credit the go to bed early so ill take it :) But I love sleep. I've relied on one of the kids to wake me up the last six years.
Who doesn't want to wake up to a little pair of eyes staring at you at the edge of the bed? The bonus is when they bring presents. My gift-giver is Joy. She thinks its okay to wake up before her princess alarm clock as long as she brings me something. It goes like this:
"Mommy is it time to wake up?"
"No."
"But I brought you dis bewtiful neckwace to wook at."
"No."
"But."
"Did your alarm clock go off?"
"No."
"Then it's not morning."
(By now I'm fully awake)
"But it is Mommy it's a tiny bit wight outside see?"
"That's the moon."
"Oh de moon is bewtiful mommy."
Yep that's almost every morning.
Anyway.
I'm gonna take Proberbs 31 more literally. Oh look, I'm already doing the sewing part...
Before...
After.
Not really sewing I guess but fabric and staple guns count. They totally count.
I have lots more to tell y'all but I've gone on long enough. For today anyway.
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