Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Thank God I Don't Get Discouraged Easily

You know you've entered the really uncomfortable stage of pregnancy when:

You bypass any shoes without an inch of cushion.

"A refrigerator upstairs so I don't have to go so far," is your answer to the question, "What do you want for your birthday?" And you are serious.

Another answer to that question, mostly to the man responsible for this state is, "My tubes tied." Still serious.

When you walk into a favorite store looking at clothes that you KNOW would not fit you but the sales lady still asks if you need help you say "Yes of course I do! Can you hold this for me, tie my shoe, grab that kid, etc." Hey, she asked. Maybe you're just a little bitter about not being able to wear any of the clothes she's trying to sell you.

You leave laundry baskets by the stairs full of laundry hoping someone will shuttle them up and down for you. You do the same with your toddler who doesn't do stairs yet. And if the man responsible for you in this state is Sean he carries them all for you every time.

You limit Sonic drinks because you're determined to beat the bathroom every ten minutes curse.

You develop a new symptom too weird to share here and when you tell your doctor he says, "Well, it's just because you're so big and so close to delivering...Oh, you're not that close you still have WEEKS left...never mind. It's just because you're carrying all of the extra weight around." You're more tempted than ever to hit him but you remember that your baby's life is in his hands and restrain yourself.

You start having dreams about birthing donkeys or ducks (hilarious Jamie!) and your only real concern in the dream is that nursing either one IS GONNA HURT.

Only your XL maternity clothes fit and you're usually in the Medium range. But you couldn't care less what your body looks like and you hope the desire to beautify yourself comes back one day.

You average 4 minutes to roll from side to side in bed. And it gets more depressing every time because you glance over and see your mate sleeping on his stomach, your desired sleep position, and growl at him.

And the final way you know you've entered the really uncomfortable stage of pregnancy:

Random lady passing you in Walmart asks you how many weeks you have left and when you tell her she says, "So are THEY BOYS OR GIRLS?" Plural.

Okay girls, let me hear it. What are the uncomfortable things about pregnancy or trying to get pregnant that you've experienced? Now's your chance to complain!


Jenny Seymore said...

Oh Mary, I needed a good laugh this morning! Not at your expense of course but for all of us ladies who have ever experienced those type of situtions! Keep up the positive thinking...she's almost here!!

Anonymous said...

Mary! You crack me up! When I was where you are (not long ago), some of the most encouraging words I heard were from a friend who reminded me of that FANTASTIC feeling you get about a week after delivering when you feel more skinny than you've ever been in your life!

And, for me, the BEST thing was when I was finally able to move around and play with Trevor...and the look on his face when he realized his mommy was "back". One day, I picked him up and spun him around like an airplane. When I put him down, he looked up at me (almost in awe) then gave me his biggest grin ever as if to say "Oh mommy, we are about to have SO much fun!"

Hang in there!

Michelle said...

I loved the rolling from side to side taking 4 minutes! I totally agree! I will say I can't wait to sleep on my tummy, but can't until I am done nursing. I envy Justin every night for several reasons...sleeping through anything and ON his tummy, not having breast, Brody adoring him now since he doesn't have "baby" attached to him 24/7. Only a few more weeks and then there are the new moments!

We Three Smiths + 1 said...

This is so funny, Mary! Hang in there...at least you are in the single digit week's remaining range now! I still have 25..yikes! And the potty breaks have already kicked in...how can that be?? She'll be here before you know it and it will all be so worthwhile!!

Miss Mommy said...

I also was quite tickled. I guess for me a fun one was having to have sex a million times to get pregnant (oh that's right you've never been THERE...) Anyway, getting to the point that you read a book that has pictures for different positions so you don't give up trying and your husband remarks that maybe you have to be black (like the people in the cartoon pic) to do it...feel free to delete this when you've read it.

Carley said...

So funny! I am so there and love laughing about this stuff with you! :) I'd give anything to sleep on my stomach! I look forward to the day when I can get up and take care of a baby in the middle of the night instead of getting up to pee! I've been doing the same thing with the stairs....leaving stuff at the bottom and Jason taking it to the top! Thank God for wonderful hubbies! Loved the donkey story! So funny!

Carley said...

Getting Pregnant: No problem!
During Pregnancy: Swollen feet and legs. Strained muscle on my belly that has made the area around it numb. You've heard my complaints! I'm glad we can vent to each other!

Emmy said...

How about... when you are NOT pregnant (and never been/never thought about being pregnant), a parent from your classroom hugging you and congratulating you on your "bun in the oven." Yep. Just said, "Nope. Not holding my stomach in today. Not pregnant. But thanks for being excited for me."

Michelle said...

So, how long did Ty grunt? Any other issues? I am debating to call the doctor, gas drops, or just "normal" baby noises. I mean, she does it in her sleep which Brody did as well, but he also eventually was diagnosed with reflux. Fun times...

Michelle said...

Called the Dr. and she wanted us to come in. I have an appointment at 10:30 am. We shall see...